forever.

Monday, October 02, 2006
10:18 PM

i've often wondered and am still wondering. Yes, i am a deep believer that i did nothing wrong in that situation, but you cant stop your mind from running wild.. searching for the reasons as to why she can turn 360 degree so fast. Do you guys call it professionalism in the first place? Does it really have to work this way? Is there no other ways, do they always have to go through the hard and fast way? Is there no sweet remedy to it all? Do we have to taste the rod to learn the ropes?

But still, i can source a hundred and one reasons to back up her doings but i cant find a single one to match the reason behind it. It just does not make sense. Human doings do not make sense, and sometimes i am ashame to be one. I have made so many mistakes in life, i have hurt so many people in my means to live. Havent i?or... havent we? Is there no better way to fix it? Must it always be a vicious cycle that we cant put a stop to?

Did the rules make us to who we are now, or have we got the ability to change and adapt to those rules that we have ignore the basic humanity? Maybe i dont understand. I really dont. Should i try to understand? No for now. I rather stay away and let them fight it out, just as long as i know i am in no wrong. let just close the issue and take it as : at the wrong place and the wrong time.

i dont want to be defensive because it will show that i am affected and i dont want to be affected by all these anymore. not worth it. really ... the game that they play at work, not worth trying to keep up or play along. i live the life i want, as long as i dont hurt anyone, as long as we are happy, thats enough really... there is a long way to go in my life... long enough to know that there are greater plans ahead than to let such an issue affect me, and short enough to know that its really nothing.

oh well. looking forward to the days ahead....:) lotsa events happening. life is going to be better with a bang! dance class l8ter. and i am going to meet my crazy friends soon:)

i'm not gonna stand here and wait.